Hello! names Kristen
sun-Capricorn/moon-Libra. 21 of age, in the south of Texas, living life so far so good :) enjoy!
"I act but I do not feel, I feel but I do not act"
"I’m getting tired of being strong, or maybe I was just hiding that I’m weak either way it’s killing me"
"what i want in a relationship is comfort"
"I’m tired from being over exhausted
Tired from the racing thoughts
Tired of being lonely in every silent moment by myself
Tired of seeing all the hurt out in the world
The worst tired is the one I feel the most, tired of living…"
"I feel i’m very intelligent, but feeling so many years have been influenced by others that I am not, well…you kind of get stuck in a very unwell-ed mind. & you become scared of even to make a move that would attract any kind of attention because of the fear of anyone knowing anything that they can remember of you good or bad. you want to keep its isolated so that they don’t get stuck in your rambling of insecurities. that’s what i fear the most. people getting to really know me."
"Your like school in the summer time, no class"
"Man! Tumblr ppl y’all are on your A game today with your posts"
"oh man, this personality disorder is a real bitch….if i could describe it to someone. id reply with well, all you feel is all these overwhelming emotions, & some days you dont feel anything just checkout of reality, the worse is the constant faking that you do just to prove to whomeveraround that your normal, oh yeah lol an i lot of “unordinary” thinking…its just not fun okay"
"what do you want"
“to be beautiful”
“do you think that everything would be better if that was the case?”
“yes, i truly do, i guess i hate myself that much"
"People just be leaving all kinds of doors open for past reasons. if you never shut the door on some they can just walk in whenever they want. I couldn’t deal with all that"
"Go to the women’s health crisis aka -psychiatrist- so much the staff at the front knows my name lol"
"someone didn`t put these ideas inside my head, i created them myself…before anyone could destroy me, i devoured myself."
"There’s moments where my insecurity over runs like right now I’m and in completely out of my mind"
"i…i dont understand why i should date, why put up the constant judging from someone who says they like & want to be with me, why date when the only good memories are the ones the 2 of you are trying to impress in the beggining, i dont understand why i cant have a happy momment with anyone. i feel so many emotions, the trama i put myself through the biggest fight is trying to
fight against my own personal bullshit and put it all aside for someone, my insecurties eat me alive the fact that i cant get close to anyone & its not that i cant i can act like the feeling are there but how far does pretending to be happy accually go? i have no ability to enjoy any affection, sex is a mystery i dont get arroused i cant even stand to see myself if the mirror anymore. whats the point of datting anyone when all there going to do is make me believe all this crazy shit i think is true. im running and running from this horrible person thats inside of me, if im not crying depressed or just paranoid of my anxiety its the horrible feeling of nothing, i dont feel human everything is a dream i dont know who i am or if i even really exist thats the scarriest feeling ever and it happends alot around friends, family, public and i just have to sit and grind my teeth and bare it convince myself that this is real dont brake, dont show people how you are they wont understand. truth be told iv been wishing to be dead ever since the age of 5 there is something serious dark going on in my mind and i feel like im never alone."
"I’m going craaaazzzzy! Holly shit :S"