thank you for your kind words; you see its so rare to meet such a believable kindness, i believe most things are tainted to mischievous intent. so here is some kind words to you. thank you for making my day & influencing me to not be so tainted myself.
i guess im scared, that in the end it was all my fault every little thing that has scarred me & traumatized my view on the world of any given situation that i was not the victim. i was the cause and that being hypersensitive allows me to blame others for what they’ve done to me, but not seeing the other side of the coin. im scared that one day someones going to point that out in front a crowd of people and im going to die inside sinking my embarrassment low in my chest and allowing that feeling i feel so often. unworthy to even be alive, because im such a horrible person connecting is what i desire to feel like im a person not some piece of shit that all it does is cry and get depressed about anything and everything. im scared that how i really feel about myself is true and im going to get called out on it, so i keep quiet and just suffer and thats what a personality disorder is all about not know how to deal with the world that your so detached from the world you dont know how to cope with anyone elses feeling but your own your not selfish, just lost